Illness: Myths and Facts According to Moi

Today my superbizor told me she had to leave early because her daughter wasn't feeling well. I said I hoped her daughter felt better, and she said, "Well, I like for her to eat fruit as snacks, so I gave her some fruit, and I told her to WASH the fruit before she ate it, and she didn't."

I was like, o.... k. Hence this list:

Things That I Don't Think Make You Sick

• Eating unwashed fruit. Unless you eat a metric ton of it, in which case you might absorb enough bacteria/pesticide/wax to make you ill. But then, eating the metric ton would probably make you sicker, in general.
• Going outside with wet hair.
• Not wearing a coat. Unless you count frostbite or hypothermia as illness, which I don't.
• Picking your nose. My grandmother's theory: picking or even TOUCHING your nose will introduce harmful finger bacteria into your sensitive nasal cavities.
  

Things That I Think Do Make You sick

• Not getting enough sleep. This is top of the list as far as I'm concerned.
• Working really hard to get something accomplished over a few weeks or months, and then accomplishing said thing. Example: rehearsing for a show and then performing in the show. Right after closing night, expect illness.
• Commuting using public transportation. Last year I got sick three times in a six month period. Thank you, NJ Transit! And thank YOU, all you NJ workaholics who pack the train to work whilst hacking and wheezing!
• Getting a flu shot. This is just hubris, people. We are not, have not been and will never be entitled to a cure for the flu. Don't front.
• Upping the amount or difficulty level of exercise you do regularly. This is sad but true: you have to run faster, lift more, and work out for longer in order to get stronger, but at the initial point of doing more, you're more illness-prone.